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Practical Eloquence Blog

Listening skills - Questioning skills - Sales

Sales Conversations that Flow: The Art of NOT Asking Questions

I love sales questions. In my training classes, I urge B2B salespeople to ask more questions, and I teach them ways to get the buyer to open up about their problems, opportunities, challenges and risks, and to get mutually involved in devising a solution. Questions are one of the most powerful sales tools you have.

But sometimes you can fall in love with a tool and overuse it, losing effectiveness and efficiency as a result. What’s the problem with too many questions? You run the risk that the buyer may feel too “led” or even manipulated, or at least not feel like they have been listened to. And, because you are so good at using questions to uncover what you’re looking for, you may close out opportunities to discover what you’re not looking for.

The most efficient and effective sales call I ever conducted took place in a boardroom in Atlanta where I met with a company’s SVP of Worldwide Sales and several of his direct reports. I had barely set the stage with my value proposition when he cut me off: “Let me tell you what I want”, he said, and launched into a 60-minute soliloquy about his sales force and its struggle to adapt to a changing market. My participation consisted mainly of nodding, interjecting an occasional probe, and trying to take good notes. By the time he was done, George had answered every question in my sales call plan, I had checked off every one of my call actions, and we struck a deal on my largest sale to date.

If there is such a ratio as revenue per word spoken, it was easily the best sales call I’ve ever made. It flowed from start to finish, and the best part was, the sale was completely the customer’s idea! It reminded me of Napoleon’s advice to “Never interrupt the enemy when he is making a mistake”, except in this case it’s “Never interrupt the buyer when they are selling themselves.” By staying out of his way, I let George have my way.

That call was extreme, of course, but it is definitely worthwhile to strive to talk less and sell more. Good salespeople accomplish this by asking more questions; great salespeople do it by asking fewer but better questions, and by going beyond questions to achieve a similar flow.

How does achieving that flow help you sell? First, people like to talk about themselves, so once you get them started, you may create a momentum of self-disclosure which can produce broader and deeper insight into their needs. Second, people like to feel important, so by being in charge of the conversation (or at least feeling like they’re in charge) can make them feel good. Finally, when they tell you the story you want them to hear, they own it, and they’re much more likely to stick to their commitments.

How to encourage conversational flow

Conversational flow doesn’t just happen; you can stimulate your customer’s willingness to talk by what you do before and during the call.

Before the call

Avoiding too many questions during the call does not mean skipping questions altogether during your preparation. The research and planning you do will help earn the customer’s trust without which they won’t open up. Besides, it’s the only way to know if the customer’s conversation is producing the answers you need. By knowing what you need from the conversation, you will have all these mental hooks on which to organize the incoming information.

It also does not mean that you should strive for a stream-of-consciousness type of flow, in which you get the customer to talk about anything that enters their mind. The most effective sales conversations have a particular structure—even if it’s not obvious. That flow is the SCR story structure: They begin by describing their situation, bringing out their conflicts, and arriving at a resolution.

During the call

There are two general ways to encourage the customer to take control of the conversation and run with it. First, you motivate them to talk and set the frame by carefully planning your call opening, and then you use following skills to encourage and channel the flow.

The first few minutes of the sales call are crucial to achieving conversational flow. Your goal is to get the customer eager to talk about what you want them to talk about. For this, you have three tools: value proposition, action statement, and agenda.

Your value proposition and action together deliver the lean communication imperative of ATQ: Answer the Question. In every meeting, the customer/prospect wants to know: “What do you want me to do, and why should I do it?” By being very upfront about it early, you dispel suspicion and jointly agree on the reason for the meeting. In the unlikely case you’re wrong, the customer will let you know immediately and you will have an opportunity to reset or pivot as necessary.

If the value proposition and action together set the destination, your written agenda is the road map that structures the conversation. In most cases, you’re going to be very explicit, even to the point of enumerating and explaining the agenda items and offering to add any issues they might have. I would estimate that a third of the calls I go on, I rarely need to use direct questions, because the customer sees the logic of the structure and willingly participates.

Even if the customer takes control and follows their own agenda, your effort hasn’t been wasted. When George began talking, I did not interrupt him; I simply slid my agenda across the table. He absent-mindedly straightened it out in front of him and kept talking—but within a couple of minutes, it became obvious that he was glancing at it and following the points I had prepared.

As the customer talks, your principal task is to listen intently and stay out of the buyer’s way if they’re following the right path, or nudge and gently re-direct them when they’re veering off. You can use encourages, probes and reflections, all fundamental following skills which you can brush up on here, or if you’re not already familiar with, you can pick up with a book or a class on active listening.

The hardest thing to do, especially when the customer is talking non-stop, is to keep the incoming information organized enough to know whether you’re getting what you need to accomplish your call purpose. That’s where your sales call plan with its prepared question list comes in handy, to help you unobtrusively check off which have been answered. I’ve also found the Cornell note-taking system to be enormously useful for maintaining situational awareness, and for recording keywords that will allow you to go back and revisit areas that need more attention.

Candidly, most salespeople aren’t ready for the ideas in this article, because they still haven’t learned how to ask enough good questions. But if you’ve already reached this stage, you can kick up your skills one more notch by learning how to go beyond questions.

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Leadership Communication

Why Soft Skills Are the Hardest Skills of All

At least half my work is with mid-level up to senior managers who come from highly technical backgrounds, so I know how hard it can be for them to master the “soft skills” of effective communication. But even so, I was surprised by the extent of the problem described in this Quartz article, ”Almost 70% of US managers are scared to talk to their employees”.

The article cites research in a 2016 Harvard Business Review article which found that 69% of 616 managers surveyed confessed that “they’re uncomfortable communicating with employees”, with the biggest concern (37%) being their discomfort with giving direct feedback which their employees might take badly.

“Discomfort” may not be the same as “scared”, but if discomfort with a certain behavior prevents you from doing your job, it’s definitely a problem. If discomfort prevents you from saying what needs to be said, that’s a problem for you as a leader; it’s a problem for the employee who does not get useful feedback; and it’s a problem for the entire team.

It’s human nature to be uncomfortable delivering a difficult message, but it’s a necessary part of being a leader. The best way to get over the discomfort  is to be good at it, and the only way to be good at it is to learn the appropriate skills. There’s a misconception that one automatically picks up the ability to be an effective communicator through osmosis—as is “soft” means easy. While I don’t have hard evidence, I’m convinced that the major reason for the Peter Principle is that people get promoted beyond their ability or willingness to communicate.

If you want to succeed as a leader, first you must learn to communicate. Hard skills may get you there, but soft skills will keep you there.

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Success

Learn Something Old This Year

When is the last time you learned something old?

I had that experience just this morning as I was doing research for an article about the risks of asking too many sales questions. I came across an interesting fact: skilled clinical interviewers use reflecting statements about twice as often as they ask questions.

My initial thought was that that is an interesting insight which could make me a better questioner and make for smoother and more productive sales conversations.

But the real point of this story is that I had already known and forgotten that fact—because it came from an article that I wrote about seven years ago!

That reminded me of an incident a couple of years ago when I was on a sales call with a CEO, and I asked him whether he still asked his subordinates to pre-send their presentations to him before meetings, as he had talked about in an interview a few years prior to our call. He responded that he had gotten away from that habit since coming to his new company, but thanked me for reminding him and said he would reinstitute the practice.

How many times has something like this happened to you? You knew something but forgot it; you had a skill but you lost it; you practiced a good habit but drifted away from it… Think about it: what have you lost by forgetting something old?

I’m not sure why this happens, but I can think of two plausible explanations. First, it seems to me that sometimes we’re in such a rush to learn the next big thing and keep ahead of the competition, that we discard useful ideas to make room for the new—like throwing out a perfectly good pair of shoes just to keep up with the latest style. Second, it’s possible that sometimes we’re not yet ready to fully appreciate a lesson, like watching a favorite childhood movie and discovering how much “adult” meaning you had missed back then. Seven years after learning that insight about reflecting skills, I have much more personal experience and book learning to relate it to and make sense of it.

What I do know is that some of the best lessons I’ve learned come from re-reading books that I’ve read before, or from periodically going back and refreshing myself on the basics of a particular topic. Book publishers probably won’t appreciate this advice, but I would recommend that you buy fewer new books this year and re-read some of your old favorites; you may be astounded by how much you can pick up the second or third time around.

They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. I don’t know about that, but I can attest from personal experience that an old dog can learn old tricks!

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Leadership Communication

Don’t Let the Bad Leaders Win

Bad leadership is on the march in the world today. The paradox of our times is that we have the best educated leaders in history, but the general quality of leadership they provide is so bad.

Let’s start with our political leadership. At all levels. Starting from the very top and going all the way down to the local level (which is an area I’ve personally been observing up close recently) appears to be rotten to the core. Sure, there have always been problems, and there has always been some endemic level of corruption, but recently we seem to be suffering from an epidemic of bad leadership. At least in earlier days, politicians had sufficient sense of shame to try to hide their transgressions. Nowadays, it’s all about winning and partisans on both sides are willing to excuse any behavior as long as their side gets more votes.

But politics is just the most obvious arena where we have a leadership crisis, business leaders are no better. In their relentless pursuit for shareholder value or a cover photo on Forbes, CEOs seem to be willing to encourage or at least pretend not to notice egregious violations of customer trust and even of the law. Get caught doing something wrong? No problem, just hire a few lawyers and PR flacks and it will soon go away.

What about religious leaders? Nope; too many of them seem to have become shills for the politicians.

Surely at least we can look up to our military leaders, right? Wrong again. According to USA Today, “Since 2013, military investigators have documented at least 500 cases of serious misconduct among its generals, admirals and senior civilians.”[1]

It can be almost overwhelmingly tempting to observe what’s going on and simply withdraw into ourselves. For example, my wife reminds me that we were both happier before we got so familiar in the past year with what is going on in local politics. Maybe it’s best to ignore the crisis of leadership around us and just cultivate our own garden.

Unfortunately, withdrawing is not an option, because the growing power of bad leaders will simply mean that they will intrude more and more into our lives. The only way out of our leadership crisis for each and every one of us who cares about our own small circle of responsibility, our company, or our nation to fight the problem. We need to step up and be the leaders we want to see.

The first step is to do no harm—don’t add to the problem by engaging in the same behaviors and misconduct. If you succumb to the “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” mentality, the bad leaders have won.

The next step is to take ownership. Don’t sit around saying someone should do something about ____; that someone should be you. You may not be able to do as much as you would like, but you can probably do more than you think. And the example you set for others may turn out to be your force multiplier.

The third step—and this is exponentially harder—is to actively battle the leadership crisis. Speak up against what you see around you. If someone is abusing their power, call them out. Of course you have to be smart about it, but there are ways to speak truth to power without getting yourself fired. (That’s a topic for another blog post.)

In the end, we get the leaders we deserve, so it’s up to us to ensure we don’t let the bad leaders win.

[1] https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2017/10/24/generals-sex-misconduct-pentagon-army-sanctions-hagel-gillibrand/794770001/

 

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