Do You Suffer from Negotiation Fear?

My son was in line to pay at a Starbucks coffee shop one time, and observed the following exchange between the man just in front of him in line to pay and the barista:

Man: How much is that pastry?

Barista: Three dollars.

Man: I’ll give you two.

Barista: Sir, this is Starbucks; the price is the price.

Man: Let me speak to your manager.

Manager: What seems to be the problem?

Man: I’ll give you two dollars for that pastry. If you don’t sell it soon, you’re going to have to throw it out.

Manager: OK.

My son (stepping up to pay): I’d like a dollar off my bill, please.

Do you hate to negotiate? Many people hate to, or fear to. They meekly pay the asking price no matter how high nor who’s asking.

On the other hand, some people seem congenitally incapable of accepting the first offer, and will argue about price at the drop of a hat. I used to work with a guy named Don, and one time in Canada there were three of us at a steak restaurant and we were all considering ordering the prime rib. Don called the waiter over and negotiated a volume discount! I wanted to quietly slide under the table, but Don just blithely went on his way. The waiter put his foot down when Don tried the same tactic with dessert, though.

As this educational video demonstrates, people who don’t like to negotiate will always be at the mercy of those who do.

I used to be firmly in the camp of those meek souls who find haggling to be either frightening, distasteful, or immoral, but I’ve learned to come a long way. Not quite like Don, but I’ve learned that negotiation is perfectly acceptable, profitable and even fun.

My awakening came about in a funny way. I was teaching a sales training class with my boss one December. We were scheduled for two days of straight sales skills and one day of negotiations training. I had never seen the negotiation module and my role was to observe and learn. Unfortunately, my boss got called away unexpectedly and told me that I would have to deliver the module the next day. I spent most of the night going over the material and rehearsing my delivery, and was able to pull off a decent performance. I can’t say for sure how much the students learned about negotiating, but I know I learned a ton, which I proved to myself when I went to buy my wife a present at a mall jewelry store. I picked the one I wanted, and then offered them half the price on the tag if I paid cash. I ended up getting it for 30% off.

Since that time, I’ve negotiated with many parties in many different countries. I haven’t always been as successful as I would have wanted, but one thing I have found out for sure: it never hurts to ask.