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Practical Eloquence Blog

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Why I Still Write

I launched Practical Eloquence eight years ago this month, and since then I’ve produced 672 articles, one full-length book and an e-book, 31 podcasts, and recently approximately 40 videos.

At the time, I wrote that I had three reasons for starting my blog:

  • To get noticed in support of my marketing and selling efforts
  • To become a better trainer and coach
  • To make a difference in the lives of others

Certainly those three reasons still apply today, although if I ever calculated the actual financial return from all the time I’ve put in, it would probably be far below minimum wage. Yet, while I haven’t gotten rich from writing this, I’ve certainly enriched myself in other more important ways.

But as the years have gone by, the ink has flowed and the keystrokes have been tapped, there are three other reasons that have emerged to not only sustain but also to reinforce my efforts.

First, I’ve met smart, caring and outstanding people in many different walks of life and spots on the globe. I’ve corresponded with a lot of them, spoken to others on the phone, and even had the pleasure to meet some in person, but the dialogues we’ve had have been fun, they’ve been instructive, and I trust have left both parties better off. (Hard to think of a better description of effective communication that that!)

The second reason is that I can’t not write. If I go just a few days without putting something on paper (and yes, I like to start almost everything I write on paper first), I find that my head gets filled with a lot of ideas, observations and questions—and I frequently find myself waking up way too early with an immediate yen to get something down.

The lesson in this, of course, is that willpower is hard, but if you do something routinely and determinedly for enough time, you no longer need discipline.

The third reason, and this one was totally unexpected to me, is that some of the advice and admonitions I’ve given out have actually rebounded and stuck to me! In other words, there have been times when I’ve stressed that my readers should do something, and I’ve caught myself and realized that I don’t follow my own advice as much as I should. Cognitive dissonance can be a powerful spur to personal improvement.

So, yeah, I definitely plan to keep writing, keep learning and keep making new friends—and I hope you keep reading.

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Leadership Communication - Podcasts

The Stuff of Leadership Communication

I don’t claim to be a leadership expert, but I do believe that, as Nitin Nohria, the Dean of HBS said, “Communication is the real work of leadership.” Or, as I like to say:

“Leadership IS communication IS leadership.”

Most of what I’ve talked about in these podcasts is about informing and influencing, but as you rise in an organization you need to add one more layer: inspiration.

Inspiration is too rich for daily consumption, but now and then we need it to remind us of timeless values, of truths and not just facts, of more than bread alone. Today I cover what you talk about, and in the next podcast I cover how you say it.

Why Do You Need Leadership Communication?

First, let’s talk about why you would even need this. After all, if you rise in the organization you will have more power over those who report to you, and you may certainly be tempted to rely just on that power to convince others to do the things you want them to do.

If so, you’re making the same mistake that Dwight Eisenhower did. After a lifetime in the military, he was used to issuing orders and being reasonably confident that they would be followed. As President, he found that the order was only the beginning, not the end. It’s the same mistake that I’ve seen in some sales organizations I work with. When I warn sales leadership that implementing a new sales methodology can be difficult, most of them confidently tell me that they will mandate its use, as if that is all that needs to be done.

The old “Because I said so” model just does not work anymore. It might have worked when managers did the thinking and employees did the manual labor (and even then it had its limitations), but today almost everyone is a knowledge worker, and often they know more than you do about their jobs. Smart bosses surround themselves with even smarter people, but smart people don’t want to be led by you or anyone else—they want you to create the conditions where they can do their thing without being bothered.[1]

Or maybe you won’t go that far, but you might think that you can still use the tools that probably helped you get to where you are now—the tools of influence and credibility and logic such as I have been discussing in all my podcasts. You certainly can and you should, but keep in mind that while that skill may have led to your title, it’s possible that your title may weaken your skill. Research shows that people  in power are less likely to listen to others’ opinions, and more likely to overestimate their ability to communicate; one study showed that only 31% of employees rate their leadership communication as effective.

So you definitely want to keep your skills up, but if you stay there you may at best be a superb manager, but you need different skills to be a leader on top of that. (I think the people who say it’s better to be a leader than a manager miss the whole point: they’re different skills for different situations and you can be good at both.) So you still can and should use those tools, but you can get even more out of your people with the language of leadership.

Leadership Language Builds on Persuasive Communication

When you go from manager to leader you don’t stop doing all the things that made you a good manager, you add more skills that make you a leader on top of that.

So, the first thing I’m saying is that leadership language is less about doing different things than it is about doing additional things. The items listed on the left still apply, but now so do those on the right:

 

·         Transactional ·         Transformational
·         Value ·         Values
·         Paycheck ·         Pride and Purpose
·         WIFM ·         WIFU

A great example of leadership communication comes from one of history’s most astute students of leadership, William Shakespeare, in Henry V.

When Henry spoke to his assembled knights and archers before the battle of Agincourt, he did not offer information. When Westmoreland wished that they had reinforcements from England, he did not say,  “Men, even though we are outnumbered by the French, the greater range of our longbows will allow us to achieve fire superiority for 2 minutes before they close with us, which will allow us to degrade their fighting efficiency by 46%…” He also didn’t exhort them to fight hard because they would be able to profit from capturing French nobles and exchanging them for ransom. Instead, he appealed to values that he held dear and more importantly knew that they shared with him: honor, courage, and glory.

Values can change over time—honor, courage and glory may not be the most important values that your subordinates crave, but the feelings that values produce are timeless, primarily self-satisfaction, full engagement, and most importantly, pride.

The difference between value and values is the difference between extrinsic and intrinsic motivation, or the difference between a transaction that improves profit and a transformation that boosts pride.

Henry disdains extrinsic motivation in his speech:

By Jove, I am not covetous for gold, Nor care I who doth feed upon my cost; It yearns me not if men my garments wear; Such outward things dwell not in my desires.

He even offers payment to those who would choose value over values:

Rather proclaim it, Westmorland, through my host, That he which hath no stomach to this fight, Let him depart; his passport shall be made, And crowns for convoy put into his purse;

He then appeals to personal pride, which he knows will resonate with his listeners:

He that outlives this day, and comes safe home, Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam’d, And rouse him at the name of Crispian. He that shall see this day, and live old age, Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours, And say “To-morrow is Saint Crispian.” Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars, And say “These wounds I had on Crispin’s day.”

Even above personal pride is communal pride. Henry knows the power of appealing to a sense of belonging to something special, larger than one’s personal selfish desires:

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; For he to-day that sheds his blood with me Shall be my brother; be he ne’er so vile, This day shall gentle his condition;

If you want to inspire, you must appeal to higher values than personal gain. WIFM (what’s in it for me?) doesn’t work for inspirational speeches, but WIFU (What’s in it for us?) does. If Kennedy had said, “let me tell you what your country can do for you,” would anyone have remembered his inaugural address?

What Do Followers Need to Hear? What is the Stuff of Leadership Communication?

I set out to write about what leaders need to say to inspire their followers, but I quickly realized that’s the wrong question. The important question is, “What do your followers need to hear?” As a leader, you are defined by the actions of your followers, and their actions depend hugely on what they hear from you. As in all communication, you need to start from their wants and needs. Just as you can’t teach unless they want to learn, and you can’t sell unless they want to buy, you can’t lead unless they want to follow.

So, what do followers need to hear?

I profoundly believe that people—most people—want more from their work than just a paycheck. Employees will try harder, think more creatively, and pour more of themselves into their work when they have three things: direction, meaning, and confidence. A leader communicates all three and inspires their best work; a manager may hit one or two one and leave potential energy unused; a mere boss ignores them and drains the life out of the workplace.

How do you choose what to say to provide direction, meaning and confidence? To simplify, let’s borrow Rudyard Kipling’s “six honest serving-men”:

I keep six honest serving-men  

(They taught me all I knew);

Their names are What and Why and When  

And How and Where and Who.

Although Kipling probably did not have leadership communication in mind when he wrote those words, let me explain how answering these six questions will give you the ingredients you need for inspiring leadership communication:

WHERE are we going? The word itself, lead, implies a direction and final destination, so the first task of a leader is to offer a vision of a promised land which is much better than where they are today. Whether it is Churchill’s “broad, sunlit uplands”, or Google’s more prosaic “To organize the world’s information and make it universally accessible and useful”, a shared vision guides, unites and inspires. Of course, it has to be something you truly and deeply buy into, not some buzzword-filled, meaningless pap conceived by committee.

WHY is it important? This a company’s reason for being. Jon Katzenbach said, “An intrinsic feeling of pride based on the relentless pursuit of worthwhile endeavors is a powerful motivating force.” People are inspired by meaning and purpose, by causes that are greater than themselves. Building a cathedral is more inspiring than simply laying bricks, even if the work is exactly the same. In a business environment, the purpose is unlikely to be as exalted as saving the world for democracy, but it should contain some service or benefit for customers. Put another way, what would they lose if your company did not exist?

WHO are we? There is a reason that Maslow put self-actualization at the top of his pyramid. We all have an idealized conception of who we are, and we will direct our most fervent energies and risk even our lives to act according to it. When Shakespeare’s Henry V utters the words, “we few, we happy few, we band of brothers”, he knew that every man listening would stay and fight against overwhelming odds—because that’s who they were. Today, an excellent corporate example is Ritz-Carlton’s motto: “We are Ladies and Gentlemen serving Ladies and Gentlemen.”

HOW will we conduct ourselves?  This is a statement of core values that are absolutely inviolate. The old saying, “It’s not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game that counts”, may seem quaint and outdated in today’s cutthroat business world, but at the end of the day, when your followers go home, they need to feel good about themselves and be able to look themselves in the mirror and like what they see. Besides, distinctive values can also differentiate you in the marketplace and serve as a competitive advantage that is almost impossible to copy. By the way, never forget that when it comes to values, your behavior as a leader speaks far louder than any words you can ever say.

WHAT do we have to do and WHEN? You can have the most powerful vision and compelling purpose and still fail to motivate your followers if they don’t have confidence that they can succeed. You have to show that you have confidence in them, and in your ability to win with them. At the same time, answering the what and when gives them the confidence that you are the appropriate person to lead them, because you have a realistic plan.

[1] See the excellent article, “Leading Clever People”, by Rob Goffee and Gareth Jones, Harvard Business Review, March, 2007.

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Success

Habits Don’t Take Weekends Off

I almost never post anything on weekends but today is an exception, and I’ll tell you why.

When the alarm (i.e. my dog Winnie) went off at 6 this morning, my wife woke up long enough to urge me to go back to sleep after I had let her out. I told her I had stuff to do, and she said, “But it’s a Saturday”.

Of course it’s a Saturday, and a perfect excuse to sleep in. But the reason I didn’t go back to sleep is that I’m nursing an infant habit. I’ve decided to write for at least a half hour every morning—before I do anything else. I let the dog out, I make coffee, and then I sit down with my notebook, start the timer on my watch, and write steadily for at least a half hour.

That habit is only six days old, and like any newborn it requires constant and consistent care. You wouldn’t bring a new baby home and then take the weekend off, would you?

There are a lot of opinions out there about how long it takes to establish a habit, so I don’t know how many consecutive days I need to keep up this routine until it develops the ability to walk on its own and care for itself. But I know myself: I get these bright ideas, pursue them avidly for a bit, and then quietly let them lapse, so this time I’m not taking any chances. That’s why today is just like any other day, and this is one baby I will gladly wake up for!

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Podcasts - Success

Embrace the Chase

The title for this podcast came from an article in last week’s New York Times about Katie Ledecky, who is one of the dominant swimmers of our times. Ledecky gets a ton of fan mail and requests for advice from young swimmers and their parents, and in reply to a parent who asked her for advice for her 11-year-old daughter who couldn’t seem to catch up to her peers no matter how hard she tried, Ledecky wrote:

“Embrace the chase of those ahead of you. The times will come and you will have fun getting there.”

Embrace the chase. The phrase struck me the minute I read it, but a week later I can tell that it must have crawled around in my subconscious, making connections to a few other ideas I’ve picked up through the years. I’d like to share three ideas from a couple of my favorite books that elaborate on the statement and may just encourage you to embrace the chase yourself.

First point: Your Mindset is Hugely Important

The first point is taken from one of my favorite books, Mindset, by Carol Dweck, who tells us that people generally fit into one of two opposing mindsets when it comes to their beliefs about personal ability. Those with a fixed mindset believe that people are born with a given level of intelligence and ability which will determine their relative capability to succeed in various fields. Those with a growth mindset believe that ability is within our personal control and is determined by effort, learning and hard work.

The distinction is not merely academic. As Dweck’s research shows, “…a simple belief about yourself…guides a large part of your life. In fact, it permeates every part of your life.” In one experiment, kids were given a fairly challenging set of questions from an IQ test. Half were then praised for being smart (let’s call them the FMers), and half were praised for working hard (GMers). In the next step, they were given a much more challenging set of questions. Those who were praised for being smart did not enjoy themselves as much as those praised for working hard. In subsequent tests, the FMers’ performance declined while the GMers’ performance improved. As a final step, they were asked to write about their experience for the next class, and Dweck found that almost 40% of the FMers lied about their performance! It was more important to them to be seen as talented than to put in the work.

So, as you can see there are definite advantages to having a growth mindset, and mindset can be learned. Later, Dweck shows how a growth mindset can be taught to kids and adults, and that’s important because A tremendous amount of scientific evidence has been gathered to show that many of the qualities we consider to be innate and genetically determined are substantially within our control. Studies of identical twins raised apart show that environment can cause a swing in IQ between 12 to 18 points, which could be the difference between a career as a professional or a more modest position.

Anders Ericsson has showed us how “natural genius” can be produced with lots and lots of deliberate practice. When you realize this powerful truth, suddenly you see your own limits in a different light. The evidence shows that most are self-inflicted. There is no need to accept natural limits, and certainly no excuse at all for anyone in a position to influence impressionable young minds, to allow this pernicious belief to take root in their minds.

Second Point: Your Mindset Affects the Type of Goals you Seek

Your mindset influences the type of goals you set for yourself. There are two general types of goals that people set for themselves, performance goals and learning goals. Performance goals are about reaching a set target, which is frequently related to how you compare to others. Learning goals focus on learning, getting better and comparing yourself to yourself.

In one study, researchers tested 167 medical device salespeople involved in a 90-day sales campaign for a particular device. It cost about $5,000, and salespeople were offered a $300 bonus for each device they sold. The nice thing about this study is that it was real-world, with actual dollars at stake and precisely measurable results.[1]

Before the campaign was announced, the salespeople were given a questionnaire to determine whether they were performance-oriented or learning-oriented. Basically, they were asked to indicate their level of agreement with statements such as, “It is important for me to learn from each selling experience I have,” or “I feel very good when I know I have outperformed other salespeople in my company.” In addition, the researchers also asked participants questions about their personal sales targets, how much effort they planned to put into the campaign (they still had to sell everything else), and how much planning they would do.

The study found that “a learning goal orientation had a positive relationship with sales performance” which is the academic way of saying the learning-oriented salespeople kicked ass.

Based on that study, plus some additional research[2] and my own 20 years’ experience in sales training and consulting, I’ve listed seven ways that the proper mindset and goal orientation make you more successful in any pursuit:

  1. You set higher goals for yourself.
  2. You try harder and spend more time.
  3. You are more willing to try difficult things and take risks.
  4. You stick with it longer in the face of failure and frustration.
  5. You are more optimistic.
  6. You are more willing to seek and accept feedback and coaching.
  7. You enjoy yourself more.

Third Point: A challenge mindset is better for you

The difference between a problem and a challenge is not merely semantic. The key point is that there is a difference between a problem and a challenge, and how you view a situation can make a big difference in your results and your personal growth and even your physical health.

  • A problem is an obstacle; a challenge is a path.
  • A problem can scare you; a challenge will excite you.
  • A problem is an inconvenience; a challenge is a gift.
  • A problem is a threat, a challenge is an opportunity.
  • A problem is zero-sum; a challenge is positive-sum.

Those all may sound like just typical motivational mumbo-jumbo, so let me bring in some of the science and the philosophy…

We’ve all been conditioned to believe that stress is bad for us, but did you know there is more than one possible response to stress? We’ve been taught that stress is caused by the activation of the fight or flight response in our minds and bodies. That response is a natural reaction to threat, which prepares our minds and bodies for superior performance, but it evolved many millennia ago in a far different environment than our modern world. So, according to the mismatch theory, our stone-age brains respond to modern circumstances in ways that can hamper performance and over time can severely damage our health.

That makes sense if fight or flight is our only option, but psychologist Kelly McGonigal explains that there are actually three different possible responses to stressful situations. Besides the familiar threat response, we can have a challenge response or a tend-and-befriend response. Although both possible responses are equally important to well-being, my focus in this podcast is on the challenge response.

The difference between the threat response and the challenge response lies in our estimation of our ability to meet the situation that faces us. When we’re fearing for our life, our body does the sensible thing: it goes into defensive mode and sends out hormones that cause a lot of changes; one of the most important is that it constricts blood vessels around our heart, because it might reduce blood loss in the event of severe injury. When we’re not in fear, different hormones cause the blood vessels to relax, which allows for greater blood flow and more energy to rise to the challenge and drives better performance, not to mention being better for us in the long run.

Evoking the challenge response does not reduce stress, but it does make the stress work in our favor. In studies, it has been shown that simply informing people that stress can help them perform better, can lead to improved performance on standardized tests, for example. One reason may be that the threat response narrows our attention and places greater focus on signs that things are going badly, but the challenge response opens our attention to more positive possibilities and opportunities. In numerous studies, those primed to generating a challenge response through prior education led to better performance. Even better, the benefits tend to last far beyond the initial priming.

So, how do you generate the challenge response? The most obvious first step is to avoid the threat response by creating the conditions so that you are not actually in danger. If you are well prepared for a presentation, you should take comfort in the fact that you are equipped to handle any difficult questions that might come up. (Or as I tell my students, if you’re nervous because you haven’t prepared well, you deserve to be!)

You can also activate the challenge response by viewing the stressful situation as an opportunity for learning and growth. Finally, you can activate the challenge response by taking Katie Ledecky’s advice to heart, and EMBRACE THE CHASE!

Please note: If you’ve enjoyed this podcast and want to see a video version of these ideas, I’ve posted four videos:

Embrace the Chase Part 1: Mindset

Embrace the Chase Part 2: Goals

Embrace the Chase Part 3: Challenge

Embrace the Chase Part 4: Talent

[1] VandeWalle, Brown, Cron, Slocum: “The Influence of Goal Orientation and Self-Regulation Tactics on Sales Performance: A Longitudinal Field Test.” Journal of Applied Psychology, 1999.

[2] Mindset, by Carol Dweck.

Succeed, by Heidi Grant Halvorson

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